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Elizabeth Silleck La Rue, Esq.'s avatar

This is such a poignant observation: "He was in a temporary state, waiting for clarity and for the weight of uncertainty to lift. He already had a lot on his plate; he didn't need an extra load of judgment from others."

That transitory state in which one waits for direction and clarity is actually very important. When others put pressure to "rush" through it, they can actually push a person into bad choices.

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Efe Çilek's avatar

Thank you so much for your kind words and for sharing your perspective! I completely agree..the transitory state, while often uncomfortable, is such a crucial part of growth. Rushing through it, or being pressured to do so, can lead to choices that don’t align with what we truly need. Sometimes, simply allowing ourselves (or others) the space to navigate that uncertainty is the most supportive thing we can do. I’m glad this resonated with you :)

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Gail Post, Ph.D.'s avatar

Great observations about how we hold ourselves back and what needs to be challenged. I love the photo of your home town. Spectacular.

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Efe Çilek's avatar

Thank you so much! It means a lot hearing this comment from you. Wishing you wonderful 2025!

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İrem topal's avatar

Alongside judgmental criticism, there are also the “you’re so strong” crowd. That one sentence that, every time I hear it, fills me with an inner sense of pride but also becomes a weight on my shoulders every time I feel weak. Because, as you said, "no one witnesses the countless times we gather the pieces of our broken spirits just to keep moving forward." I know I don’t have to always be strong, and I’ll admit, I do love feeling seen. But while I thought I had come to terms with my moments of weakness, I’m realizing I don’t fully understand why that sentence still triggers me.

You’ve poured your heart out again, my open-hearted friend. It’s so beautiful to witness and reflect on this. Thank you so much for sharing!

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Efe Çilek's avatar

I find it fascinating how phrases like ‘you’re so strong’ can carry both support and a subtle burden. Strength, in this context, often feels like a double-edged sword—while it defends resilience and shields you from vulnerability, its sharp edge quietly turns inward. You feel it in your hand, cutting as much as it protects, a constant reminder of the weight you’re carrying. It becomes both armour and wound, leaving you to navigate the tension between pride in your strength and the need to protect yourself.

Perhaps the trigger lies in the weight of expectation that strength inherently carries, even when it’s meant as encouragement. It’s such a complex dynamic, isn’t it?

I appreciate how you’ve come to recognize the moments of weakness alongside your strength—it’s a profound act of self-awareness. Believe me, if this power weren’t with you today, it might have been impossible to come to such realizations about these moments.

It means so much to me that this resonated with you. Te amo <3

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Countrywoman’s Guide's avatar

A lovely piece to read, full of powerful observations. Thank you

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Efe Çilek's avatar

Thank you so much 🥹❤️

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